Thursday, October 27, 2011
The Adventures of James #1: The Tragedy of LecGie
This is what I do when I get bored =P
Disclaimer: The following events, though directly taken from real life, are purely fictional. Any resemblance to real persons, living, dead, or imaginary, especially those written on purpose, are purely coincidental. Give James all your money. Thank you.
Friday, September 30, 2011
What has gone before...
So, a little bit has happened since I was last writing regularly.
First off, I switched back to real school. That's right, I'm no longer a homeschooler. Although this means I don't get to sleep in every day or never change out of my pajamas (two things which, although my homeschooler friends assured me they were just stereotypes and not actually true, I did all year) it does mean that I actually get to have human contact on a regular basis. I'm not so good with the existing-apart-from-society thing.
Second, I decided it'd be a fun pass-time to stop a lawnmower blade with my foot. A word to the wise - unless you have super awesomely strong bones (like me) and/or a relatively weak lawnmower (which may or may not be what I have), it'll probably take a few toes off. For me, it only cut up my shoes and took about... all the skin off the top of the front right side of my foot and a lil' bit of bone.
So, I got to go in an ambulance for the first time in my life. Yay. Though first about six people had to carry me up two hills.... I'm still amazed that I managed to survive that part of the whole ordeal. The funny thing is that I seriously don't remember any pain. I mean, I'm sure I felt pain, but I went into shock almost instantly. Seeing half the skin on your foot pealed back on the wrong side can do that to you.
Oh, and morphine is very good. So is hydroxin.
When used legally, of course. Don't do drugs, kids. People will draw on you and you'll forget to give your friend a ride, and then a big up arrow will obscure your whole vision. It's true - they put it on TV.
Anyway, I was on crutches for... six weeks? Eight? Something like that. Loosing mobility sucks when you have to go places, but it's seriously awesome to have a legit excuse to lie in bed and do absolutely nothing for a really long time. I also found out that my friends actually do love me. Thanks, guys.
Oh, and now I wanna be a docor. Who'd've guessed it, right?
James
Who Would Like To Point Out His New Invention - the Double Contraction
First off, I switched back to real school. That's right, I'm no longer a homeschooler. Although this means I don't get to sleep in every day or never change out of my pajamas (two things which, although my homeschooler friends assured me they were just stereotypes and not actually true, I did all year) it does mean that I actually get to have human contact on a regular basis. I'm not so good with the existing-apart-from-society thing.
Second, I decided it'd be a fun pass-time to stop a lawnmower blade with my foot. A word to the wise - unless you have super awesomely strong bones (like me) and/or a relatively weak lawnmower (which may or may not be what I have), it'll probably take a few toes off. For me, it only cut up my shoes and took about... all the skin off the top of the front right side of my foot and a lil' bit of bone.
So, I got to go in an ambulance for the first time in my life. Yay. Though first about six people had to carry me up two hills.... I'm still amazed that I managed to survive that part of the whole ordeal. The funny thing is that I seriously don't remember any pain. I mean, I'm sure I felt pain, but I went into shock almost instantly. Seeing half the skin on your foot pealed back on the wrong side can do that to you.
Oh, and morphine is very good. So is hydroxin.
When used legally, of course. Don't do drugs, kids. People will draw on you and you'll forget to give your friend a ride, and then a big up arrow will obscure your whole vision. It's true - they put it on TV.
Anyway, I was on crutches for... six weeks? Eight? Something like that. Loosing mobility sucks when you have to go places, but it's seriously awesome to have a legit excuse to lie in bed and do absolutely nothing for a really long time. I also found out that my friends actually do love me. Thanks, guys.
Oh, and now I wanna be a docor. Who'd've guessed it, right?
James
Who Would Like To Point Out His New Invention - the Double Contraction
Friday, September 23, 2011
It's been a while...
Well, guys, it's been a long time since I've posted here. Quite frankly, I just ran out of material, drive, and... whatever that third thing I needed to write this thing was. Magicalness, I guess. Or caffeine. They're more or less the same thing.
Well, I've definitely got more material now. And more caffeine. And a whoooooole lot of boredom.
Well, actually, I'm just writing right now because I'm downloading stuff off of Steam, and I don't feel like watching TV right now.
So, first things first: Google+ is out. Facebook is retarded. Everyone - and when I say everyone, I mean EVERYONE, should move over to Google.
The fact of the matter is, kids, Google knows how to make its users happy. They're innovative. They add little things to make everything better, and everyone agrees that they're brilliant. Their coders own Facebook's by a factor of infinity to the power of infinity times two. (In layman's terms, that means Google doesn't do stupid things you don't want it to. Like Facebook chat does. All the time.)
On the other hand, when was the last time Facebook made a change that people liked? When was the last time you woke up, looked at a new Facebook, and declared, "But soft, I am filled with joy, and the birds doth sing their angelic music and dance in choreographed patterns, for Facebook hath changed for the good of all!"
Frickin' never, that's when.
Moreover, Facebook decided to make its most massive change ON THE DAY GOOGLE+ CAME OUT. Why? Honestly, if this doesn't certify the Facebook execs as freaking retards, I don't know what does. They obviously don't interact with their clientele in any way, shape, form, or fashion. All they had to do was give us a freaking dislike button, and Facebook would have won.
Facebook = STOOBID. Get used to it.
James
Who is Very Angry at Facebook.
Well, I've definitely got more material now. And more caffeine. And a whoooooole lot of boredom.
Well, actually, I'm just writing right now because I'm downloading stuff off of Steam, and I don't feel like watching TV right now.
So, first things first: Google+ is out. Facebook is retarded. Everyone - and when I say everyone, I mean EVERYONE, should move over to Google.
The fact of the matter is, kids, Google knows how to make its users happy. They're innovative. They add little things to make everything better, and everyone agrees that they're brilliant. Their coders own Facebook's by a factor of infinity to the power of infinity times two. (In layman's terms, that means Google doesn't do stupid things you don't want it to. Like Facebook chat does. All the time.)
On the other hand, when was the last time Facebook made a change that people liked? When was the last time you woke up, looked at a new Facebook, and declared, "But soft, I am filled with joy, and the birds doth sing their angelic music and dance in choreographed patterns, for Facebook hath changed for the good of all!"
Frickin' never, that's when.
Moreover, Facebook decided to make its most massive change ON THE DAY GOOGLE+ CAME OUT. Why? Honestly, if this doesn't certify the Facebook execs as freaking retards, I don't know what does. They obviously don't interact with their clientele in any way, shape, form, or fashion. All they had to do was give us a freaking dislike button, and Facebook would have won.
Facebook = STOOBID. Get used to it.
James
Who is Very Angry at Facebook.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Dreams
Dreams are funny things.
No, I'm not talking about people's fond wishes for the future. I'm talking about those weird things that happen in your head when you go to sleep. I really like my dreams, personally - a lot of times they give me inspiration for stuff in life. But sometimes' they're just creepy...
Like take last night, for example. I dreamed that I was driving through some random neighborhood. I parked my car and started walking across people's lawns (don't ask me why. It's a dream. I think I was looking for someone, though.) Then for some reason I got spooked and turned to go back, except I hadn't been paying close enough attention to where I was headed, so I'd forgotten where I'd left my car. I found it after a little bit and started driving away, but it got stuck in the mud. So I got out to push...
And then I saw it. A dead cat.
No, not a dead cat.
A cat that had been murdered.
Seriously, there was some evil blond chick running around and killing cats. Apparently I was afraid that she was going to kill me too, so I picked my car up (apparently my subconscious thinks quite highly of my physical prowess) and swam to the other side of the river with it. Where'd the river come from? Your guess is as good as mine...
So, yeah. I don't know why I wanted to share that with you. But I did. And you better have liked it. Or else.
Crazy dream stories are always fun, so here's y'alls chance to use that comment box down there...
James
No, I'm not talking about people's fond wishes for the future. I'm talking about those weird things that happen in your head when you go to sleep. I really like my dreams, personally - a lot of times they give me inspiration for stuff in life. But sometimes' they're just creepy...
Like take last night, for example. I dreamed that I was driving through some random neighborhood. I parked my car and started walking across people's lawns (don't ask me why. It's a dream. I think I was looking for someone, though.) Then for some reason I got spooked and turned to go back, except I hadn't been paying close enough attention to where I was headed, so I'd forgotten where I'd left my car. I found it after a little bit and started driving away, but it got stuck in the mud. So I got out to push...
And then I saw it. A dead cat.
No, not a dead cat.
A cat that had been murdered.
Seriously, there was some evil blond chick running around and killing cats. Apparently I was afraid that she was going to kill me too, so I picked my car up (apparently my subconscious thinks quite highly of my physical prowess) and swam to the other side of the river with it. Where'd the river come from? Your guess is as good as mine...
So, yeah. I don't know why I wanted to share that with you. But I did. And you better have liked it. Or else.
Crazy dream stories are always fun, so here's y'alls chance to use that comment box down there...
James
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